Tri... trianti-wonti...

Some time ago, I discussed with acb the possibility of uploading the entire Triantiwontigongolo compilation, with artwork and high quality mp3s. However, he kept whining about the quality of mp3s I sent him - despite using the LAME encoder set to the recommended settings, the mp3s kept coming out at a low, static bitrate instead of the hoped-for VBR - and I gave up. Anyway, I've decided to cut the Gordian knot and just post the damn low quality mp3s, together with equally low quality artwork. Given that the songs are recorded on four-tracks in people's living rooms, I hardly think they require FLAC to be enjoyed.

Rather than post by artist, I've decided to post just in random groups to show the diversity of the music on the cd. If you are one of those artists (or the distributor - Iain, you out there?) and you don't want your track posted, get in contact (my email address is written in the sidebar).

Sweet Cynicism, Popemobile (NOTE: This link now works - thanks to Dave for pointing out the error.) [EDIT: Link removed but Dave still thanked.]

Hey, all you bands who've been slagged off by Ben Butler - wanna hear him sing? I actually quite like this song, but there is a fairly obvious reason why Ben's a journalist and not a rock star.

Blood in the Streets, Masonite

You'll either love or hate this (the linked review hated it), but for some reason, it's grown on me over the years. If it's any comfort to you (and the reviewer), it's supposed to be a pisstake of Oi!, a genre I am utterly unfamiliar with, so have to enjoy the music based on my liking for yelling and tuneless brass sections.

Dragster - Deep Sea Diver

I know almost nothing about Dragster, but I like them a lot and this is uploaded as your dose of conventional, pretty pop for today (that's not supposed to be perjorative). I know that the singer was in a band called Wondrous Fair, AND I'M ABSOLUTELY FUCKED IF I CAN FIND ANYTHING ON THE WEB ABOUT EITHER BAND. If you know of anything please list it in comments.

Presumably, the name of the compilation is based on the mythical creature, more or less invented by C. J. Dennis, called a Triantiwontigongolope. "Triantelope" is a name for the huntsman spider, a mostly-harmless but nevertheless intimidating companion on wet nights.

Next fortnight, some Space Food.

Shut Up - The Footy's On The Radio

Despite the title, I am in fact posting something not TISM related.

Book Review:
Players, Tony Wilson

I've despaired recently of finding good, readable trash. Being a student, I haven't read a novel for pure pleasure in almost literally years (I certainly can't remember the last time I completed one), and in between the International Relations reading brick and Introduction to Development Economics, I really want to read something that doesn't tax my brain too much. The problem is that writers, readers and publishers don't seem to be able to identify what George Orwell called the Good Bad Book – the book with no claim to dealing with The Great Issues Of The Day or a unique artistic prose style, but which has characters you could give a frot about and moves along at the proverbial "cracking pace", which will enable you to finish it in a few hours in between the 2500 words about the impact of the Accord on industrial relations and the 3000 words on conditions leading to the adoption of full suffrage throughout the Commonwealth.

Most trashy books (whether labeled 'chick-lit' or not) are shit. Not because they deal with shopping and fucking – Jane Austen has made a two-century career out of shopping and, er, courting – but because ultimately you don't give a shit whether the 5,374th plucky, feisty, pleasantly plump and socially awkward heroine will overcome her personal foibles to get off with the conventionally handsome, rich hero who is nevertheless human underneath it all. It's not the standardness of the plot – what do they say, there's only seven stories in the world and three of them star Tom Hanks? - but simply that the book is executed in a really stiff, obvious way, where you can almost see the MS Word Airport Novel Template in use.

Players is a good bad book. I doubt it will have any impact outside the Aussie-Rules playing states of Australia, but part of the pleasure of it is that it's so goddamn parochial, so very, very Melbourne. The characters are incredibly obviously based on local celebrities, and if you were listening to 3RRR's Breakfasters program during the time the book was written, you'll be amused to pick up bits of story that were obviously discussed on the program (such as the phrase "going completely otter" as an alternative to going "off-tap" or "ballistic").

The basic plot is not too important, although I bet it went down well with the people who are obviously being parodied. The good guy is Billy Nock, an AFL star on his way out, left over from the days when best and fairest actually meant best and fairest, succumbing to 'old age' (in footy terms, 35) and injury, and host of a low-rating TV show in the olden style (think Lou Richards and Footy Franks). The bad guy is Sam Newman, I mean "Tickets" Thompson, honourably retired champion, host of a blazingly successful TV show, and all-round arsehole. Thompson makes a high-rating living out of humiliating and offending the vulnerable on a show which has less and less to do with footy, to the delight of the fans. The story starts when Thompson headbutts a homeless crazy dude with minimal provocation, and the show's producers move into an increasingly elaborate plot to cover up the assault.

The rest of the story gets frankly weird, but that's not really the point. The attraction is seeing your "favourite" stars given a roasting they firmly deserve. It's funny, extremely easy to read and won't demand much from your brain. Highly recommended. Buy from Readings

Super Request Tuesday

For the bloke who asked for it in comments - and NO, I won't always be this immediately responsive - here's the TISM Christmas tracks that were briefly on www.tism.com.au a couple of years ago.

Then The Answer Came [lyrics]

I Ain't No Christian, But I Believe In Jesus [lyrics]

The first one is heaps better than the second one.

Who's A Jovial Fellow, Then?

I seem to have lost the first post for this blog, but it didn't have anything on it anyway. The basic gist is this - a blog to post things you couldn't easily get.

The title of this blog comes from what I tend to consider the best track from This Is Serious Mum's 1988 album Great Truckin' Songs of the Renaissance. With competition from tracks like "I Shit Me", "Kill Americans" and the epoch-making "Defecate On My Face", I've always considered it a tad blasphemous that TISM aren't internationally known on the same level as GG Allin, Anal Cunt and The Bee Gees. There's a sentiment amongst Australians that TISM have better song/album titles than songs (and an even commoner sentiment that they suck shit and should fuck back off to their Camberwell Rotary Club meetings), which as a fan of both cheesy 70's rock and cheesy 70's disco I'd like to dispute very much. Anyway, here's some examples - woo yay for synth rock with Grano Padano!

Martin Scorcese Is Really Quite A Jovial Fellow, from Great Truckin' Songs of the Renaissance [EDIT: Removed to make room for next post above]
I Don't Give A Fuck, grabbed from the White Albun DVD.

My favourite Scorcese movie is probably Goodfellas, but I'd put in a good word for King of Comedy. ("What? No Taxi Driver? No Raging Bull?" Fuck off, I'm a real person, not a fucking TIME-Greatest-Movies-In-History-O-Matic.)